The Intrepid Thai Driver

Thai driving habits are something worthy of mentioning, and a forewarning if you actually plan to visit the country.  

After living in the "Land of Smiles" for the last few months, one thing is blatantly obvious here - driving in this country is absolute insanity! 

No, I haven't been to India. No, I haven't been to Egypt. No, I haven't been to Namibia. No, I haven't been to (fill-in-the-blank with the worst country to drive in).

Many people claim there are far worse places for your daily commute.  But after some internet perusing, I quickly discovered the statistical truth behind the ominous driving habits of Thais.

Thailand is now considered the second most dangerous place to drive in the world!  

...and from what I've personally seen and heard so far, I believe it! 

Just the other month, another bus in Northern Thailand careened off the edge of a cliff, plummeting hundreds of feet down a ravine where 30 people died. Incidents like this have become commonplace, and raise for serious concern when commuting around the country.  When something like this happens there isn't much recourse either - I guess there isn't anywhere, really.  But here, it almost seems like officials do nothing to really address these issues, at least outside the obligatory public safety announcement following a tragedy in attempt to appease tourists who fear for their lives on every departing bus or train.

So like most things in Thailand, you need to look out for yourself and make the safest decision with the information provided.

My advice: avoid the overnight buses across long distances, especially the north where you pass through mountainous terrain at high elevations.  Most of the drivers are extremely overworked and potentially strung out on amphetamines.  

You would think trains are the safest and most obvious option, however many of them are outdated and running on fragile rail systems in desperate need of repair. 

Trains here just aren't that safe either.  

First thing to note while driving on the roads here, "red" doesn't necessarily mean stop.  Its more of an indication that you should yield and look around, and if no one is approaching, just go for it.  This cavalier attitude will get your ass hit quicker than you can remember the Thai name of the street you're on (most street names are like 15 letters long). But I've basically learned all colors mean yield (particularly GREEN), and to use your own judgement to gauge when it's actually safe to cross a street, rather than the traffic lights.  This logic is uncomfortable for most Westerners, especially for someone like myself who hasn't routinely driven a car in almost four years. 

The other day, I was driving along the south moat near Chiang Mai Gate, and witnessed this brave act of commuting with what I assumed was the beloved family dog, "standing" on the back of this motorbike with his two front paws on a single supporting bar, just cruising down the street. 

 
The driving here is just rediculous.

More often than not, I see a single person driving a brand new four door Toyota truck with no one else in the vehicle. While a family of four is carelessly packed together on a single motorbike (sometimes one being an infant child held in the driver's lap - with no helmets!), following dangerously behind.  I can't help but think that this poor family could dramatically increase their life expectancy by opting for the "safer" four door pickup...but that just isn't as fun.   

Motorbikes are a way of life here, and now, for me as well.

Motorbikes are efficient and actually really fun to drive - aside from the elevated risk of death, it's awesome! 

At every intersection when traffic is backed up, all motorbike drivers weave in and out of the idle cars to make their way to the front of the line.  On a motorbike, you rarely have to sit in traffic!  Almost everyone commutes by motorbike, unless you're an affluent teenager who's mom just bought you a brand new truck for your 16th birthday...lord help us all! But seriously, many Thais here have money and have nice rides (especially Toyota trucks), but for the majority of those living here, motorbikes are the preferred and most efficient means of travel.

So whether you're driving your child to soccer practice (well, football here), to the market, or to make an urgent trip to the hospital, Thais generally accomplish their transit needs via motorbike.  

So when visiting Thailand, be extremely cautious and aware of the elevated risks while commuting around the country, no matter what mode of transportation you choose.

Oh, and yes mother, I wear my helmet! 

Songkran Festival 2014

Songkran is a huge festival celebrating the Thai New Year, held in April and marked by the Buddhist tradition of sprinkling water on others as a form of cleansing.  This is by far the largest and most important holiday, where people travel from all over the country, and really the world, to Chiang Mai for the largest Songkran celebration.

The Buddhist traditions are mostly practiced at the temples around town.  There, scented water is poured over the statues of the Buddha and loved ones.  People gather around and listen to monks speak.  

Meanwhile, as Buddhists worship at temples throughout Chaing Mai or travel to visit family, the other side of Songkran can only be most accurately defined as the biggest water fight in the world!  This is where massive super-soakers and buckets are loaded full of water and sprayed into strangers' faces, with every car in the overcrowded streets equipped with 55 gallon barrels of water, "ammunition," ready to unload on anything that enters the reach of those at the helm. 

Massive blocks of ice are purchased from random folks lining the streets, tossing freezing water on completely suspecting passer-buyers.  Random "fill-up" stations were available around the moat and the old city.  Local businesses take the four-day hit on their water bill to keep the party going with an unlimited supply of water from their tap, usually through an industrialized sized hose endlessly filling barrells with water. 

But the best part of all...you get to act like a complete kid again!  

I mean, everyone of all ages participates in the fun.  Running around laughing like a giddy little child, getting pelted all over with refreshing water while boiling under the sun.  You really feel that youthful spirit come alive.  Like, man, I remember those days!

The city hosts many concerts and DJ's all over town.  Although I was rather fried and didn't do a ton most evenings, there was a bunch going on after sundown.  Some of the big malls host live music on their doorsteps, and bars uncomfortably packed with lines out the door, clearly violating capacity.

It's madness!  It's refreshing!  Its disgusting, at times!

Its absolutely the best festival in Thailand, especially here in Chaing Mai!

But no matter what, you don't leave your home without getting annihilated with water- it's just understood.  Either from a small child wielding a super-soaker the size of himself, or a sweet old woman tossing cup sized amounts of water as you pass her front porch, you WILL get soaked!

After the third day I was kind of over it though.  Living as a bachelor and eating out at restaurants every meal, I just don't have food in my fridge.  So when trying to leave my apartment to get some breakfast that fourth day, I just wanted to be dry and eat in peace.  Ha, but good luck with that, I was eating completely drenched, and honestly, it didn't matter.  

All you can do is smile.

I've never seen anything like it before.

The country literally comes to a complete stand-still!  Everything shuts down - minus some bars and restaurants, because of course, that's what fuels the festivities. 

Embarrassingly, I actually locked myself out of my apartment the first day of Songkran, only to find the small note in broken English written on the leasing office door, "Office close, no key no in apartment until 4-15." 

It was the 13th.

How I managed to "break-in" later that evening is another story - returning home completely soaked from head-to-toe, a little drunk and exhausted, I was determined to concur that locked door. Needless to say, I wasn't homeless for the duration of Songkran.

Songkran couldn't come at a better time too.  April is apparently the hottest month of the year, and when Thais call it hot, it's baking!  I can now say living in Chaing Mai, April will personally and very appropriately be marked as the month where I average three showers a day, and celebrate the craziness that is Songkran!

This is a must when traveling to Thailand, mark the date - (April 12th-15th).  

April is a fantastic time to be in Chaing Mai!